Thursday, March 17, 2011

Kids. They Can Drive You CRAZY…

…especially when the snow keeps you
cooped up in the house for days.

Welcome Sandi. She is a crafty SAHM to a 6 year-old boy who clearly had to spend too much time indoors with him during those 2 weeks of snow we had in our neck of the country.  I was totally there with her. Those days we were snowed in were crazy. My boys needed to go outside BADLY. Almost as badly as this momma needed them to go outside.

Sandi blogs over at CraftingWithRHINOS.

When I volunteered to share a story with Jami's followers while she was on her family vacation, so many crazy adventures came to mind. You see, I grew up in a family that loved travel. My grandparents had an RV and took us on fabulous trips all over the United States. It was miserable being cramped in such a small space for hours at a time, but also very fun.

I started by making lists of some of my favorite excursions, and soon had pages written with all sorts of hilarious stories I could write about. Narrowing it down became frustrating, especially with my 6 year old son high on cabin fever.

Being trapped in our house during all of the winter weather we have been "blessed" with, along with his nasty cold, has had him poking at my nerves with imaginary thumb tacks. Inevitably, I started daydreaming of far off (and somewhat horrific) places that I could ship him off to.

You understand.

I know you have spent moments wishing your kid(s) were anywhere but where you are because they were making you want to shave your head bald.

Ok, so maybe that is just me. The bald part.

So the daydreams started coming more frequently as I found myself trying to hide from him (and sometimes his friends) in my own house. That's when I began writing down some of the more "unfortunate" destinations my mind had been plotting for him.

Here are just a few:

  • Trekking through the Sahara, with a bottle of what appears to be water dangling mere inches from his grasp. Only to find out after reaching and gulping down half, that it was filled with donkey sweat.
  • Being made to pick up glitter (one piece at a time) after a Martha Stewart taping, to be allowed entrance to LegoLand. And then finding LegoLand had been closed down forever.
  • Be given the keys to drive a race car at the Indy 500, but every step he took towards the car, it would get smaller and smaller. And when finally reaching it, it poofs into a pink Barbie corvette toy.
  • Letting him loose in a video game store, with an unlimited shopping spree card. But finding all the game cases to be empty, and all the game stations not working.

You get my drift. I am diabolical. I truly do love my son, and don't actually wish him any harm. Most of the time. But this last week has been the bane of my existence! But I do thank you for letting me stop by, and hope that none of you actually never get the chance to piss me off!

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